Adventures in Running

We've discussed my love/hate relationship with all things running. I'm not gonna bore you with those details again...but, what some of you may not know about me is that I hate to suck at something. I despise the feeling of not being awesome at something. I despise the backward, goofy way of learning something & being a complete tool-y novice. So, what this turns into is me standing stagnant in the proverbial middle of the road & not wanting to proceed to unchartered waters. Mainly for the fear of being uncomfortable & giving people more of a reason to think I'm a loser. So...I work on this alot. I may not make tons of progress - well, I do, but it's at a snail's pace - so I've been trying to apply this progress to running (and cooking, but that's for another blog post).

2 Sundays ago, I decided to take a quick jaunt around the block before getting ready for church. I left the house around 0730 & told my husband that I'd be back around 0800. I get bored really easily, so I'm always looking for another route, so I decided to head up the street in a different direction from usual. There were other runners...so I knew I was at least not headed toward oblivion. It had rained the night before & was a little overcast - pretty good weather for a jog :) So, I'm cruising - sorta, getting passed by some more hardcore people - and I start trailing a couple of joggers (which later in this story will be referred to as ultra-marathoners). I get to the top of the hill & see some Fleet Feet people who have set up a little water station. Nice. But, I'm starting to wonder if I've ran my way into a race that I didn't know about. Well...the runners that I'm following take a little left turn & I decide to follow them. By this point, it's pouring rain. I'm handling it okay - feeling a little hardcore, actually. So, this street that I'm running on becomes more woodsy & longer than I expected. I have to stop & walk...the ultra-marathoners keep on truckin'. Then I begin to get a little nervous about the woodsy-ness & my alone-ness. I keep thinking, 'seriously, what a crap way to die'. Every rape story about lone runners kept going through my mind. Oh, and have I mentioned that it's POURING down rain now? Yeah...I keep pushing myself to run harder & longer so I can catch up with the ultra-marathoners so I don't get raped in the woods. There's no catching up with them, really, but I just keep plugging along. Every inch of me is drenched. I'm trying to protect my iPhone in my shorts waistband between the elastic & my skin. Doesn't really matter - it's drenched, too. Might I mention that my fat roll is bouncing up against the screen & keeps repeating the song that is playing. Again, nice. I've lost the ultra-marathoners by now. I'm pretty much clueless as to where I am until, from the heavens, a street sign appears & I realize that I'm kinda far from home - and I'm gonna be late, too. So, I run & walk & run & walk as hard as my little heart will pump & take a little run across the cemetery. At this point, I finally end up on my street (still in the rain) when my phone rings. It's Jimmy. He says, "what are you doing?". I say, "running"; he says "no you're not". I say "how do you know". He says, "I have my ways". I'm a little freaked out until I see him & W in the car cruising up behind me. He rolls the window down & in his cute smirky way, he says, "wanna ride home?". I gathered up my pride - and my very wet clothes & said "Nope. I gotta finish what I started". So I did. I ran the rest of the way home. I was greeted by a tiny girl who said, "Eww Mommy, you're wet"...and I was late for church bc I didn't get home til 0817. But, I kept my pride intact. My poor husband's phone was dead, so he decided to use the car charger & come looking for me. He was afraid that I was drenched under some pavilion trying to call for a ride. Ha ha. But sweet, nonetheless :) This run was a total of a big 4.1 miles. Woot :) I was a little proud, despite the debauchle. And my friend Shari informed me that I got caught up in the middle of a training run for the Cotton Row 10K. Ha ha ha! Best way to increase your mileage: Get lost.

I'm really trying at this running thing, but it's hard to look like a professional when you don't have on the proper attire. I'm wearing a hodge-podge of stuff because I'm a faux runner. This past Sunday, I pulled my ear-buds from my bag & found a little hunk of chocolate on the piece that's supposed to go in my right ear. How awesome was that? Might I also mention that on this past Sunday's run there was a Labrador Retriever who smoked me. He left me in his dust. He does have 2 extra legs than I do...maybe I'll just keep telling myself that ;)