Jeans

So...yeah, hey! It's my birthday!!! The big tres six is upon me. Age has never really bothered me...probably because I have always looked young. Well, admittedly, this one is hurting a bit. I see some wrinkles and some sags, my skin is lack luster, & I'm wondering how much longer I'm gonna pull off having really long hair? I'm wondering why I have adult acne and why the sins of a 16 year old tanner have to show themselves 20 years later? As an aside...good Lord? Has it been 20 years since I got my drivers license? I still remember my picture...ya know, the one in which I was rocking a turtleneck. Seriously? I drove to cheer practice that day. We were making signs. With those super cool paint markers that made you high. I'm sure I wrote my name on the (now nonexistent) stage that day :) aaaah! So, that could be a total separate blog. Anyway, today, as I turn 36, I'm gonna talk to y'all about this dilemma of mine. Many (especially the girls) will relate. 

I've got this pair of jeans, okay. I spent about $130 on them. My husband wasn't excited, but I was. Probably because when I got them, I had just gotten back to my pre-pregnancy size after having baby number one...and the sales dude told me that my butt looked good in them. He probably lied, but I was happy, so I bought them. Perfectly worn, you know you pay more for the holes and distressing. Those jeans have been everywhere in the last 7 years. I had to put them aside as I grew baby C, but, thankfully, I got back into them afterward. Woot woot! Love those jeans! I'm sure you've seen me in them, or heard me talk about them. Cause I wear them OUT. I may have paid a lot for them, but I bet it has averaged out to half a penny per wear over the last 7 years. 

So, to cut to the chase...I was wearing the jeans last week, and felt an usual breeze; one that I had never felt before while wearing them. I pretty much did a yoga pose to figure out what the mess was happening, and there it was. Sigh. A hole. ...and not a hole from the manufacturer. I really think that I have gone through the five stages of grief. (DABDA - for those down with Elizabeth Kubler-Ross)  I've denied and pretended like the hole was from the manufacturer and perhaps I had missed it for 7 years. I have been angry....maybe my thighs are too big and they rubbed together so much that they created the hole - and I should just be happy that I didn't spontaneously combust. Bargaining...but, if this could maybe be all a lie and I can lose a couple of pounds, no one will see the hole and we won't tell anyone. Depression - what am I going to do without these jeans that have been such an important part of my life?! Look at all the things they have done! And...that one dude that said my butt looked good? What if it never looks good again? What if it's just an old 36 year old mom-jean wearing sad sack? And finally, I'm really working on this one...acceptance. 

Acceptance. There's a hole in my youthful, good butt jeans. So, I need to rectify the situation by purchasing some more. Herein, the dilemma lies. Do I purchase the exact same jeans? Is that legit? Or does that make me a has been? You know that someone from the 80s is still trying to find her 10th pair of sassoons! I don't wanna be that girl!!! Or, do I (gulp), do what all females everywhere dread, and (gasp) go jean shopping?!?!? What to do?!? I have looked online and on eBay. Gosh, that eBay part sounded really desperate when I typed it :( What kind do I want?!? The options are endless- and scary! I want no muffin top....but no high waist. No sparkles on the butt, but it doesn't have to be plain. Do I totally splurge again and buy the High dollar jeans? Or buy 5 pair of $40 jeans in search for the holy grail of jeans?!? Can someone put me out of my misery and pick them for me and try them on me while I'm under general anesthesia or something? Because, this girl is fragile while trying on clothes!!! 

My birthday...I tried on one pair. They were cheap (relatively speaking). They were too big and I looked like a frumpmeister. Next. 

Yeah...so, next...I didn't have the guts! I touched a lot of jeans, but tried no more on. What am I gonna do?!? Shout out to me!! Cure my dilemma. Aren't some of y'all short? Do you have any suggestions? I may be 36, but I'm still spunky. Or, just tell me to suck it up and go buy a repeat of the jeans...or, maybe I should pretend like the hole isn't there. They are totally wearable and don't show anything inappropriate....

Help a sista out! 

Oh, and I missed y'all! I've got some topics rumbling about the brain :) this could be a renewal season! 😘