This week, I read something referring to Pinterest as 'Satan's Website'. I giggled a little at that, but you know, sometimes, I feel like Pinterest was sent to steal, kill, and destroy...much like the dark one himself. It steals/kills/destroys your joy because you can't craft as good as others, your hair isn't that pretty, you aren't as skinny as those models, you will never afford all of the clothes that you pin, you may only use one or two of the recipes that you pin, and if you're like me, it will turn out to be an epic failure and you will throw it in the garbage and go out for Chinese (again). You know your house ain't that organized, you ain't ever gonna make those freezer meals so you never have to cook again (other than the 30 straight hours you spend preparing them). Those inspiration quotes you pinned...yeah, they are nice, but if you're like me, you're too busy perusing the awesome kitchens and bathrooms that you can't afford to focus on those 25 Bible truths that you posted...or dwelling on how you're gonna make time for the 32 workouts that you've pinned. You get it...right??
Well, if you know me or follow me on the social media frenzy that we call Facebook, you know that I love it! I do! I think it's intentions are wonderful! I truly enjoy seeing the pics of people's kids and catching up with people that I never get to see in "real" life, or that I haven't seen since high school/college/grad school/second college/old jobs, etc. It is a source of connection for me. I also love that our small group at church has a private page that we can encourage each other, pray for each others' requests, and plan social events. I even like the fact that there are online yard sales so I don't have to get up at the crack of dawn and wade through other people's crap to possibly find one diamond in the rough that might fit my kids. I also enjoy sharing pics of my sweet family and saying witty fun stuff and the feel like you are "watching" a football game/news story/awards show with 651 of your friends. It's fun! :)
But...of course, with good, comes bad. Sometimes, I do feel like Facebook might could be called Satan's Website, too. So, this is the part in which I rip it a little bit. I'm gonna give my usual preface...I told y'all that for the most part, I love it. I'm not holier than thou and I am guilty of almost every single thing that I'm about to joke on...and if you've done it, for Pete's sake, don't defriend me. I'm not putting names with any of this....honestly, I feel like I have early onset dementia because I couldn't remember the word "gift shop" yesterday, so, I am not calling anyone out! For reals. So, here's what I hate about Facebook...and let's be honest, you do too.
Facebook has a nickname in my family. It's "The Mecca of All Information". I know stuff that happens in my parents' town sooner than they do, and they live there. My parents' will tell me something that's going on, and I quickly reply, "oh, I knew that last week". I get the funny pause, and my Dad says, "oh yeah...the Mecca of All Information". Yep. We also have a countdown. There will be an event, and we will get in the car, and I will say, "this will be on Facebook in three...two....one...", and I'll pull up FB and BOOM! There's the pic of it...or the tag of the locale.
There's also the posts. They make me laugh. Again...sometimes I'm guilty, so don't hate the player...hate the game.
*"Just have a lot on my mind tonight...." "Rough Day Today" "Prayers Please" "Sometimes I wonder if this is all worth it". You get the gist. Followed up by 25 comments of "are you okay??" "what's going on". Then followed up by no response from the original poster.
*RTR! Our team just whooped your team's @**. Your team sucks!!!! HAHAHAHA!!! Told y'all I'm not holier than thou. I know I've been hidden for football season before. I'm pretty hardcore, although, I've had a couple of folks tell me I've been toned down this year. Ha. Mainly because I've watched several games in a place with limited internet access. You're welcome :) Of course, this can be reciprocated by the Alabama haters. "Go Johnny Football....I hope you tear the Tide up" or various comments about cheating and Scam Newton and NCAA sanctions, etc. These are always followed up by secondary statuses about "keeping it classy", etc. Or, in my case, people not believing your pure "Bless their Hearts" and texting/messaging you about your jerkiness. Then there (sometimes) comes the apology status (guilty as charged).
*The weather. Another fine topic of statuses. We hate summer! It's hot and miserable. Then there's the summer lovers that put us on blast and talk about how awesome the weather is on the beach. We love fall! We are rocking our sweatshirts and scarves, but still wearing flip flops and making smores and burning our pumpkin candles while eating vegetable soup. And, the cool weather haters are busting us down with the missing of swimsuits and watermelon. Can't we all just get along?
*Your workout. Guilty upon guilty upon guilty. And I will continue to be guilty. Because I'm proud. I want you to know that I ran today and I feel good. Maybe it is motivating, maybe you hate me for it. People love for others to know that they did something good....and some days, I feel like it's the only thing I did for myself, so I'm gonna share it :)
*Jealousy. FB breeds jealousy. We see your pics of you driving your Range Rover. I see you wearing your bikini, surrounded by your 6 beautiful children, on the beach in Hawaii. I love your boutique outfits and I see that you hang out with the ladies from Duck Dynasty on the regular. I see that you take amazing vacations with just you and your husband for a week or two. I'm wearing scrubs and have greasy hair. My baby is teething and gets pissy at night. My oldest pitches fits about shoes and I haven't had a real vacation since 2010 or 2011, or even a night alone with my husband since sometime in 2012. And my small SUV....too small. Not a hater, not at all. Okay...maybe I did sip the haterade.
*Politics. Oh boy. Politics. Differing opinions and people is what makes the world go 'round. It's life. Of course, I would love for everyone to agree with me and have a harmonius life of love and happiness. But, it ain't gonna happen. Some of the worst fights I've seen on FB are regarding politics. Obama and his crew vs. Romney and his crew. Dang y'all. The chick fil a debacle. Good grief. Just eat whichever fries you want. Gay marriage vs. no gay marriage. Obama care vs. Blue Cross. Alabama vs. Auburn (okay, so, it's not politics, but it's pretty major). People get straight fired up about this. And, you get behind a keyboard and don't have to face anyone about it. Wow. People start saying stuff they would never ever say before. Defriending happens over this one fo sho!!
*The pictures. Yes...that's part of what I love. But...what about when you see pics from a rip roarin' good time that you weren't invited to. (I know I wasn't supposed to end the sentence with that word, but it sounded to proper to move my words around). Anyhow...y'all have all been victim. You see the pics of your buddies (sans you) whooping it up, and you get all sad and depressed and don't even "like" or "comment". Boom. That'll teach 'em. Yup, yup...guilty as charged. Then next time you see your friends, you act all funny because you know they didn't invite you. Self esteem killer. Thanks Satan. That can go for tagged statuses too. Your peeps taggin' folks they are with and you're like...oh...thanks for the invite!!!! Or...the stuff you weren't quite ready to announce to the world yet, but someone comes up and posts the pic and tags you in it. I've gotten fired up about that greater than one time. Maybe there should be permission slips....
*Cryptic statuses. Vague status updates, including song lyrics or creepy poems. We are all guilty. Some may just love the poem or lyrics and it is speaking to them right then and they could give two poops at the 50 comments of "what's going on?" or "do I need to stage an intervention?" or "should I call 911?" or maybe that's the motive. Hey Jack, I'm not here to judge. Just layin' it out there. FB is full of them.
*The statuses/comments in which sarcasm doesn't translate. Yeah. That too. That happens frequently. I feel like if we're gonna get all social media-y, that we should have a sarcasm font. It would save a lot of hurt feelings!!!
*Trouble. Yes, trouble. That's my number one complaint, I think. Hmm....maybe I just can't keep my mouth shut. Naw. It ain't that. If you ask anyone who has asked me to keep a for real secret, it's like Fort Knox. I'll talk some trash with you, but if you ask me to keep something quiet and off limits, it's better than done. I am guilty of posting something on FB while mad or hurt and wishing that I could take it back. Usually, it occurs after I am sane again and 671 people have already seen it. I'm getting much better at that. I sometimes scroll through my FB and think...'ouch...if only they would've had a little extra time to think before posting'.
FB is fun. It is, really. It eats up WAAAAAY too much of my time , but it also has provided me endless entertainment during nursing sessions when my baby falls asleep and I need to sit there quietly. Aaaah...there's your answer to why I have been on so much in the last year :) I have contemplated sabbaticals from it...especially because I feel like scrolling through it has made me counterproductive and even late to an appointment or two. I'm a dawdler while getting ready, by nature. I probably won't take a sabbatical. Unless y'all all defriend me because you think I was calling you out in my blog for your cryptic status or the time you busted Alabama or the time that you all went out and didn't invite me :) Ha ha.
I would love to hear your takes on the big FB. So, comment away :) On FB, naturally! ;)
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