Keeping up with the....what???

I read recently that there was a psychiatric diagnosis that was directly related to depression due to comparing yourself with everyone else on facebook and blogs and movie stars, etc. Perhaps after my CMA round up, you felt yourself feeling hideous and sad. Ha. Perhaps not. Anyhoo, it's just a side effect of being so "in touch" with the lives of others because of instant updates - FB, Twitter, blogs, 24/7 news. So, I made the blog rounds tonight. You know, caught up with the blogs that I follow - some friends, some acquaintances, some strangers. After I read, I found myself feeling inadequate. Honestly, I think it began because I spent almost 4 hours rearranging and organizing our pantry, only to find out that I still can't see crap in it and even all of my new plastic bins meant to hold stuff seem like a waste of money. Grr. In my mind, it was gonna be so awesome, and I was gonna post it to pinterest and people were gonna repost it over & over again and it was gonna be amazing. Woah. Yeah, that's a prime example of why I get my feelings hurt easily. I set my own self up. Gosh, I'm chasing rabbit trails tonight....back to the matter at hand...

I was checking out these blogs of these pretty people and their pretty families who are all going pretty places and serving God prettily and being prettily witty and going to pretty lunches with their pretty friends to pretty restaurants and pretty conferences. They cook pretty food and wear pretty things and life is so grand and pretty. You know what? I'mma have to throw a flag on that! Personal foul. You're lying!!! I'm gonna give props to my girl Paula. She's the blogger at AKA Jane Random...you should check it - AKA Jane Random - she's fo' real. She posts funny stuff about drawer pictures (you know, those random hideous pics that you find when you are cleaning out a drawer), and messiness, and telling an obnoxious fan at a football game to sit down. Gosh, that's some real stuff. You feel good when you're done reading....you aren't wondering why you can't attend the pretty parties and be serving prettily - you think, 'man, I wanna hang with her...her life is like mine!'. Rabbit trail again....so, I'm gonna stop feeling sad for not being invited to these pretty things and not saying enough pretty things etc and celebrate reality.

Here's my reality (so, you the reader, can feel better and want to come read again): I have a big time management issue, I love to read and will read even though it ALWAYS makes me late. I hate the fact that I'm always running at least 5 min behind what I should be. I will say that my time management problem has made me work well under pressure. We don't take enough family trips. I'm not creative in coming up with fun things to do with my kid. I'm not that great of a cook and I don't do it often because I just can't think of anything to make. I sleep too much and buy too many things from the internet. I'm ocd about my calendar and will purchase a new calendar if I have made too many scribbles in there. Sometimes I am just straight up lazy. I have issues and am just stone cold weird about some things pertaining to weight and food. I fall asleep saying my prayers more often than not. I am thoughtful in my brain, but don't act on it near enough -because of my time problem and my fear of someone laughing. I really am "that happy". I love art projects. I have more ideas in my mind than I have time to do them - hence the time management problem. Running is my therapy currently. I am addicted to Diet Coke. I love my husband and my child, but am a little lax on the homemaker thing. I need to brush up. I love my job and think I'm kinda good at it, but want to be lots better. I give too much of a darn what others think, so I'll probably never be in charge of anything. It might be okay with me...maybe? I feel guilty because I don't use my talent of singing and I let time be an excuse as to not do it. Yeah, that and fear. I probably think you're judging me right now. That's my reality.

So, when you see those smiley pics on my blog and on my facebook - it's me...but, it aint perfect. It's a work in progress. Just wanted to throw that out there....you know you wanna come back and read some more now!!!! If nothing else, to feel good about yourself :)