First of all, I find it pathetic that awards shows have become so classless that there has to be an email sent to publicists and wardrobe peeps banning side boob, butts, and crotches. Seriously? I spend my time in the mornings making sure that no one accidentally sees my goodies. Is it some kind of a trip to make a "nip slip"? If we nip slipped at an awards show for our work or for our kids' school, I would expect some kind of disciplinary action :/ and we aren't talking about the occasional accidental whale tail when you bend over....ugh. Anyway, here goes...
So, I'm scrolling through my Facebook news feed and realize that I have some pretty hilarious friends saying some epic stuff about the Grammy peeps...and I'm dying to have a "guest blogger" bc that makes you seem legit in the blog world- so my proposal is to compile hilarity from my facebook news feed. I'm not gonna use names and call anyone out, although I'd be flattered if someone thought my junk was funny enough to blog :)
Adele - whom I love, so this pains me....
- she looks like a bowl of potpourri
- she looks like a poinsettia gone wrong
TSwizzle - okay, that's Taylor Swift, for y'all that don't speak gangsta :) I love her, but my newsfeed peeps, not feeling the love! Eeek.
- the Taylor Swift opening act on the Grammys wouldn't last 15 seconds on the gong show
- watching Taylor Swift sing along with everyone else is almost as entertaining as just watching the performers.
JLo - I'm gonna throw a flag on this one. This has been on my mind a while about her...she has totally had a tummy tuck. I'm not busting it, she's rich as heck, so why not? But...why wasn't that in people magazine. You know her belly doesn't look that awesome after carrying twins. No way. She has a six pack. Totally got those blown out abs fixed!!! I also found it funny that she acted all surprised that people made a fuss about the split in her dress
- I'm going to start standing like JLo is, everywhere. Doing laundry, grocery store...church...
- how does JLo go to the bathroom in that dress? (Reply: just moves it over, it's only half a dress)
Dierks Bentley - he's a cute man. Yes, he is. And he typically looks dapper
- I'm not a country music fan, but how is Dierks Bentley doin'?
Carrie Underwood- pretty much does no wrong. I want to look like her...but 2 8 1/2 pound kids made that impossible. Well, that and Arby's and Starbucks.
- can Carrie breathe in that dress?
Faith Hill - okay, so her and Tim McGraw are so skinny, I wonder if they have run out of $ and can't afford to buy food anymore. I bet Obama could hook them up with some government assistance. What the heck? But...this thread by a friend of mine made me LOL for reals.
- ok, has she had a stroke or is it Botox gone bad?
- something is wrong with her face big time, her mouth is pulling to the right. (Great assessment skills by a nurse friend) ha ha!
- I think she has braces, I saw her on something and she kept licking her lips so I kept watching to see what was going on and I think she had the clear ones on. She looks horrible.
- (this comment made me lol so hard) when you do that much heroin, something's gotta give.
Justin Timberlake - there were a lot of thirty somethings who were going wild over you!!! Ha. There were numerous comments about his suit and tie and numerous "wows" and virtual grunts.
- oh JT, you did give me a tingle
- my boyfriend did such a good job. See you when you get home, JT. Xoxo
- jT and Adam Levine back to back? I can't handle it!
- is it bad to say that I would have JTs baby?? (My husband knows)
Rihanna - she is pretty, but with each passing year, she ups the trashiness ante. I don't get it. Just stick to singing and stop promoting domestic violence by getting back with Chris Brown.
- did she change her red see through dress? I saw her nipples on the red carpet. (See, trashiness factor completed)
Bruno Mars - he is a funny looking individual. Bet his nurses when he was born called him a FLK (funny looking kid).
- can someone kick Bruno Mars off the stage and bring back the Black Keys?
- love Bruno Mars, he's so precious.
- I just realized I'm a big Bruno Mars fan...weird. (From a dude)
Prince - this dude has to be getting old. And I think he may weigh less than I currently do, so therefore, there is a little dislike...but his songs are still the bomb...and 1999 makes me laugh bc we lived it :) and when he wrote it, it was so futuristic. Like a big deal.
- prince...why the cane? (Awesome reply: to
Prop up his aging ego!) Hahahahahahaha!!!
- prince wears 54 pretty good
- that cat is creepy!
- was it his song that we used to go to sleep to and have the stereo blasting in the apartment?
Frank Ocean - I have no earthy idea who this dude is...but my fb friends have some very big opinions on him...
- who is this new whistling Frank Ocean character? He is terrible. Sweatband, really?
- singing about Forrest Gump...bad move.
- (this one owned me) sorry Frank, but the real 'Ocean' is Billy #Caribbean queen
There you have it, folks. Not my typical Grammy blog. It was powered by you, my funny Facebook friends. That's when I love Facebook. It's like watching the Grammys with 600 of your friends. Ha ha!!
No comments:
Post a Comment